Laughing right now as I listen to my playlist titled CB. I start at What Kind of Man by Florence + the Machine, then switched to All of Me by John Legend. Now I hear I’m Not the Only One by Sam Smith. Hmm.. as I’m listening I can’t help but notice the resemblance to our “relationship”. I put that in quotes because I’m not sure exactly what you can call what we have done for the last year. We go from happy to mad, sad to glad, then to confused to finally being honest about our feelings and then just when everything seems to be aligning right some curve ball is thrown our way and one of us ends up angry with the other person again. It’s been a total roller coaster. He’s done things to hurt me and I've definitely hurt him as well. Still we always found our way back to one another because while it hurt to deal with each other I think it hurt more not to. I kept trying though. Just waiting for the day we would be on the same page at the same time. Unfortunately that day hasn't come. It’s been a constant game of cat & mouse. Both of us taking turns doing the chasing. Well the game is finally over. I could go more in depth about our issues but that’s not the point of this post. The point is that while it may not have always been roses I gained so much from knowing him. I’m happy that I can walk away and see the positive in it all. When we first met I thought there is no way a guy like him would ever like a woman like me. He definitely is easy on the eyes. I had zero confidence and immediately started trying to sabotage the entire situation. I told him the first night we hung out that I couldn't date him and only wanted to see him every now and then (once every other month to be exact). Did I mean this? Absolutely not but I was so worried that he wasn't into me that I figured I’d set the boundaries before he did. Stupid, I know. I was just so scared of getting hurt. He still continued to pursue me and with that came texts every morning calling me beautiful. At first I thought it was cheesy & wondered how many other women he had said that to but after awhile I became accustomed to it. With time I started to actually believe him. Sure I may struggle with body issues and I’m not nearly as close to my goal weight as I’d like to be but overall I do think I’m beautiful. Inside and out. It took hearing it over and over again to convince myself but I finally stopped responding with “Whatever.” and started saying “Thank you”. I've always had a hard time accepting a compliment but with him it became easy. He told me all the time that I was a really good woman and would point out all my qualities that he liked and boy did it help boost my self esteem. Being a single mom I feel like I’m constantly under a microscope so to hear someone telling me I’m doing a good job felt amazing. When I would vent about things I was going through with Makenna’s father he would quickly offer to “kick his ass” and while I’d laugh it off part of me enjoyed his concern. He wasn't serious of course but it felt kind of good to feel that protection of a man. I’m very independent and I know I’m strong enough to handle just about anything but even someone like myself likes the safety of having a strong man by her side. He gave me much more than I think he’ll ever realize. It may have been a rough ride but overall I’m walking away from this happy to have experienced it. I’m going to miss him. I loved that man & I’m not afraid to admit it. In the back of my head I will always wonder what might have been had we ever been able to let our guard down with one another and truly enjoy what was going on. I know its for the best though. Time to take what I learned and move on to the next chapter.
Monday, April 20, 2015
Our second stop was in Grand Cayman. We ended up doing a snorkel/stingray excursion directly through the trip. While I loved it, part of me wishes we would have looked into a private tour and hopefully had more time when we got back to explore the island a bit before boarding again. There was a lot of confusion with our drivers to and from the marina where our tour began. Snorkeling was fun but I didn’t see very many fish while there. Not sure if it was the location, time of day or what but there wasn’t much to see in the water. The reef however was beautiful. I didn’t have a camera but luckily my brother brought his GoPro so we have pics/videos from him. I will update with those soon. Stingray City was next and better than I expected. I probably could have just stayed there for hours. The stingrays were so sweet. I was able to hold, feed, and even kiss them. Talk about an amazing experience.
Our first stop was in Jamaica. Thank goodness because we decided to visit Dunn Falls and honestly I do not think I could have made it through had I already spent two days snorkeling in the other locations. Yes, Dunn Falls kicked my ASS! In all honestly its not so much that its hard to climb there were just so many holes. If you can manage to dodge them you’ll be fine. The water is not clear so I could not see and I fell more times than I can count. Twisting my ankle, landing on rocks, cutting up my legs, yeah not the best experience. Still…I’m glad I did it. I do recommend going if you visit Jamaica but make sure you are in good enough shape to where you actually can enjoy it. Had I not had my brother there to help pull me up some of the times I would have had a lot more trouble than I did. So I’d say that was my least favorite spot while there. We ended up booking an excursion through a private tour company which was a great experience. Her name was Patrice Bailey and her number is 1876-509-7542. She can also be reached via email at email@example.com. She was very professional and made sure we were back at the ship with plenty of time. Our tour guide was Anna. Make sure if you book a tour through Patrice to ask for Anna. She was so sweet and had us laughing the entire time. I will say that most of Jamaica was not as pretty as I expected but Anna had the driver take us to areas with great views for pictures. We finished with lunch at Scotches and then a quick rum tasting after that. Scotches was the best food I think I’ve ever had. I fell in love with the jerk chicken and Jamaican cornbread. Definitely a place you need to try while there. While Jamaica may not have been the prettiest place we stopped I fell in love with the people. They were all so welcoming and made you feel like you were part of their family. So did I truly enjoy this destination? “Yeah Mon” – as they say in Jamaica
Here is a little info on the 7 night Royal Caribbean cruise we took April 12th through the 19th aboard the Navigator of the Seas. We left out of Galveston, Texas and stopped in Jamaica, Grand Cayman, & Cozumel before returning back to Galveston. This was my first trip and I was beyond worried about motion sickness but it ended up being a wonderful experience. 7 nights might have been a little too long for me though. Next time I’d like to only be on the ship for 5 nights or less. Regardless I had a fabulous time. I had my doctor prescribe me anti nausea patches which worked wonderfully. I only had one night that I felt sick and that was after a very long day of snorkeling etc so that may have also been a factor. It still was nowhere near how I would have felt had I not had the patch. I definitely recommend anyone who goes on a cruise to get patches. Biggest surprise on the cruise? Well I’d have to say it was the on board entertainment. All of my friends told me before leaving how much I’d enjoy all the shows & entertainment ….they were right! From the ice show to a chance to see REVoiced perform, a hilarious Sexiest Man contest (by the pool), a few comedy shows and then the most interesting adult scavenger hunt I’ve ever been a part of….I had an absolute blast! Not to mention all of the stuff on the cruise were incredibly sweet. They were so helpful and made us feel right at home. Overall a great experience. For anyone thinking about traveling on this cruise line message me with any questions you may have. I can tell you the best places and a few of the things I probably will skip my next time around.
Favorite Meal – Dinner at Sabor (new restaurant located on Navigator of the Seas)
Favorite Game Show – The Quest (adult scavenger hunt)
Favorite Thing to Do During the Day (relax by the adults only pool)
Where did I spend most of my money (The Casino of course. Be careful!)
Best indulgence – A massage package. Watch for them daily in your planner. They always have different specials for the day. Absolutely loved my massage while there.